Just avoid this with your Boss

Bosses usually have a strong sense of recall (if your boss is the forgetful kind, then yoo-hoo! for you), so you better watch out what you say to them.

What you say today could land you in trouble in future if you’re not careful with your words. There is a reason they’re the boss and you are well, you. There are things better left unsaid. Like they say, if you don’t have anything positive or productive to say to your boss then shut up and eat your fries! (Or something like that).

For those of you who lack tact, we’ve compiled a list of what not to say to your boss. (We asked bosses, of course.)

1. “Do I really have to get this finished today?”

Yeah Sherlock, you do. D’uh. You’re being paid to get it finished, aren’t you? Or were you sucked in by some sort of a tornado of misinformation – one that made you believe that it’s the water cooler conversation that’s getting you the top reviews? Apart from managing their own life, your boss has the added responsibility to manage you and other members in your team – don’t add to their burden by being noncommittal. Do your job before you log off. Hey, that rhymes. Sweet. Now get back to work.

2. “Give me a better desk now or I quit!”

And I wanna sing along the streets of Venice. How do you expect ultimatums to work out with someone higher up in the power structure? Throwing tantrums never helped anyone; even a 4-year-old will vouch for that (after they’ve grown up). Take the mature road and understand that an open dialog always works.

3. “Umm… isn’t it my turn for a promotion yet?”

Oh hell yeah! Why not just go for gold and become the CEO instead? Why bother vying that VP or SVP position? You’re obviously flowing with the self-entitlement needed to embarrass yourself. Well, here’s the thing, those guys probably worked their tails off, took risks, and braved many obstacles instead of sitting in a corner and sulking about their ill fate. If you want to be taken seriously at work and not treated like a 9-year-old, quit whining and get productive.

4. “That’s not my problem.”

Ahem, but your boss says it is. So, you don’t have much choice now, do you? The responsibility to rectify the problem fell into your lap. Stop wasting precious time throwing silly questions around and take the opportunity to be a part of the solution. Your boss wouldn’t have approached you if you weren’t capable of handling it. So, buckle up and get it done.

5. “Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

Playing a damsel in distress will gain you no sympathy from your boss. You have been selected for your position for a reason, you know. If the boss has to instruct and direct every assignment then the boss may as well do the job. Based on intensive third-party research and in-house surveys (which we also like to call ‘common sense’) — being proactive and far-sighted hasn’t killed anyone yet.

6. “That’s the best I can do!”

If everyone is just to keep repeatedly mouthing these words, why don’t we all throw our hands up in the air, buy tickets to Tahiti and forget about even trying to do great work? Instead of taking the defeatist way, how about you look at your work and see how you can improve it — make it better in whichever way you can? Adopt the problem-solver approach, become a valuable asset to your company and maybe you’ll actually start enjoying the challenges that you’re currently bogged down by.

7. “Why can’t you have XYZ get this done instead?”

And while they are at it, can they can start on my other unfinished assignments too please? Well, go ahead and take the week off, or maybe a month, why even better, just stop showing up for work altogether! XYZ can take care of everything, thank you. Nobody likes themselves a lazy employee who can’t even run to the cafeteria to get their own chocolate donut. If your current work doesn’t motivate you, do everyone a big favor — find out what you enjoy doing, drop what you’re doing, and get started with the former instead. Not too hard now, is that?

8. “It’s 6 PM and I am leaving.”

Only sitting ducks count hours. Unless you’re Paris Hilton’s third cousin’s cocktail friend — the social life can wait. The idiot box and your fluffy couch won’t be going anywhere anytime soon either. Every organization faces a crunch situation from time to time, the leadership expects all hands on deck during such times. If you’re going to be a little, riddled-with-homework-kid about it — well, buy a cotton candy and go home really. Nothing much to be done here.

9. “That’s what she said!”

Innuendos are a strict no-no at work. Just because it sent you running on a laughathon when Steve Carell and team said it in The Office doesn’t mean it’s okay to replicate it at your workplace. You may not only get a cold stare from your boss, but you will also be at risk of being sent to a ‘well wisher’. Nobody fancies themselves a branded ‘office perv’ (at least most normal people certainly don’t). So hold your tongue in front of your boss (not literally though — that would be just weird as hell) and leave the off-color jokes for your obnoxious drink buddies.

Posted in: Boss,office,TIPS